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March 7, 2016: Misgendering

March 8, 2016

Mara is still in Florida with her dad, who is still in the hospital and needs a lot of care. He addressed her as Mara the first time he saw her; but now, he is misgendering her and defaulting to calling her Gary. His cognitive function declined a bit over the last couple of weeks, which may be the reason. Mara gets that, but she says it still hurts. The misgendering, plus the mental and emotional exhaustion from taking care of an elderly, ill parent, took its toll the other day, and she had a good cry when she was alone. I wish I had been there for her.

She’s coming home this weekend. I’m going out of town on business for a few days, and both of our return flights are on the same airline and are scheduled to arrive in L.A. on the same day, within five minutes of each other. So we’ll see each other at the airport after 2 ½ weeks apart. And I don’t care what other people in the terminal think; a huge hug will be long overdue.



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