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Sept. 21, 2015: Mara’s First Shower

September 21, 2015

We went to a bridal shower yesterday. It was Mara’s first post-transition shower. It was for a friend of ours — a back-up singer in a band that Mara plays in. The other women who were there were all around our age. Some of them knew us (and knew Mara is transgender), and some didn’t. But they all welcomed us. You could say that, after her first shower, Mara come out smelling like a rose.

When the bride-to-be was opening presents and she got to the one from Mara and me, I guess some of the ladies might have thought we’re a lesbian couple, and that’s OK. We didn’t feel any need to announce to anyone that Mara is trans. It wasn’t our party, and we weren’t interested in taking the focus off of the bride-to-be.

But also, we just don’t care. If we happen to be in a conversation with someone and the subject of the nature of our relationship comes up, fine. We’ll let people know we’re a trans couple. And if they want to know more about our story, we’re happy to tell them. (There are two questions that we won’t answer, though: whether Mara has had bottom surgery, and what our sex life is like.) Otherwise, we don’t say anything; we just enjoy hanging out with people.



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  1. Sept. 28, 2015: Mara’s First Wedding | transwife

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