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April 6, 2015: Allies and Other Strangers

April 7, 2015

As a trans ally, I can relate to this article in Everyday Feminism, which dispels some myths that cis people — even allies — have about the trans people. Especially Myth 2: “Dating for transgender people is just like LGB dating.” Uh, no. There are so many points on the continuum of trans relationships, several of which the author of this article mentions. As I’ve blogged before, my relationship with Mara isn’t homosexual or heterosexual. It’s transsexual. It’s one of many different types of transsexual relationships.

I just heard about a reality show that’s debuting on the Discovery Life Channel on April 11. It’s called “New Girls on the Block,” and it’s about several trans women who are in different relationships. One is married to a cis woman; another is dating a guy; two others are in a relationship with each other, etc. I hope the show has enough appeal to cis people and educates them not only on the trans community but also on relationships within that community.

Myth 4: “Geography Doesn’t Matter” also rings true. Which is why I think it’s great that the trans rights movement is getting attention on a national (and international) level. Mara and I are blessed to live in California, the most progressive state in the U.S. for transgender rights, according to the blog Refinery 29. And I hope that someday all states become as progressive on this issue. Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean that crimes and discrimination against trans people don’t happen in California. But the advancement of trans rights is making people more aware of this community. And the more aware you are and the more facts you have, the less fear you have. At least that’s been my experience.

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