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August 22, 2012

August 23, 2012

I’m in Hawaii. No, I’m not on vacation; I’m here for a conference. Not a bad place for one, but I’m not exactly frolicking at the beach; just meeting with people, sitting in conference rooms and working in my hotel room. I miss Mara and our two kitties. But this trip is short; got here Tuesday and leaving Friday. I’ll return — with Mara — when we can spend some time enjoying the islands.

Mara has had a knot in her back for a few days. She has laid on a heating pad and taken ibuprofin. Jogging has helped a bit. And I massaged it a couple of times. But it has persisted. I spoke with her on the phone tonight, and she was watching “Groundhog Day.” Great film. Really a good message about how we show up in the world. She said she cried through the whole movie. Part of it was the movie and part was just releasing some of the tension. She’s having a bit of a hard time dealing with the fact that members of my family, who really liked her, including my mom, now won’t even talk to her, even if she is presenting as male. They just don’t want to have anything to do with her. One of Mara’s strong points has been that just about everyone she meets likes her. So this is hard. I know it’s my family’s prejudices that are driving their emotions toward her, and she doesn’t need to take it personally. But if I were in her shoes, I’d feel bad too.

They have fallen all over themselves to let me know how much they love me, how they’ll always be there for me (especially if my relationship with Mara “goes south,” as one of my brothers says), etc. I hope they know that, although I really appreciate these efforts, I am committed to my relationship with Mara. I don’t think they really believe that.

Oh, by the way, after Mara had a good cry tonight, her back pain went away.

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